Moms: Make Yourself a Priority!

By Allison Berman
March 9, 2010

It's late for New Year's resolutions, so today, on my 36th birthday, I am making a birthday resolution to take better care of me.

I make an effort to look nice most days, but I am not as put together as I used to be. I used to get my nails done each week and my hair cut every six weeks, and I used to frequent the makeup counters in department stores.

Changing standards

Now the closest my nails come to polish is paint from my projects. Until last week, it had been five months since my last haircut. (I actually had to promise friends I understood not having time to get a professional haircut does not warrant me cutting it myself.) And my makeup now consists of drugstore lipstick and mascara.

I used to buy pretty clothes when I saw them - even if I didn't imminently have someplace to go. I rarely change sizes, and since I have pretty classic taste, the clothes wouldn't go out of style, so it didn't matter if it took a while for an occasion to arise. And when it did, I was prepared.

Changing priorities

Buying clothes when I came across them meant I didn't waste time I don't have searching for the perfect "something" you can never find when you are looking for it. And I always went out feeling like I looked my best- something I can't say anymore.

It's not that I gave up on my appearance entirely. I don't venture off my street less "dressed" than jeans and a cute top, but I have been known to sleep in yoga pants so I can take my daughter to her bus stop without screaming to the world, "I slept in these clothes last night!"

Getting five more minutes of sleep took priority over putting on makeup. And considering my daughters stopped spitting up on me just in time to get teeth — a milestone ushered in with perpetually runny noses they wiped on me - I rarely bought new things. What was the point if they were going to be covered in peas? Instead I just wore out and/or ruined the cute things I had.

Pressure to look good

Well, a few weeks before two formal winter parties (read: snow), I had my wake-up call.

I discovered my only dress shoes were open-toe — totally impractical in the winter since I won't wear stockings with open-toe shoes. And upon inspection, I noticed they were kind of worn. When I figured out they were 14 years old, I realized why!

I immediately ordered new closed-toe shoes online - and made a promise to myself. I was done staring into my closet wishing clothes or shoes I needed would magically materialize. I always find time and money so everyone else has what they need, and I am going to look after myself just as carefully.

Don't underestimate the value in not just looking good, but in looking your best. You will present your best self - not only because you look great, but because you feel great, too.

Allison Berman, an artist and mother of two, handpaints custom home accessories for interior designers and private customers. She works out of her home studio in Warwick, NY. See her collection at www.withlovealib.com. She can be reached at ali@withlovealib.com. Her column appears Tuesdays.