Tis the Season, but the Economy isn't Cooperating

By Allison Berman
December 9, 2008

The holiday season is upon us, typically a lot of family time, and a lot gift giving; however this economy might warrant "adjustments" on both fronts. Some can''t travel because they have to work. For others the expense of traveling is too great with job uncertainty, and that ambiguity can necessitate tweaking gift giving as well.

If you can't travel, get excited about starting new traditions. What can you do to keep your table from being empty? Celebrate with friends. I have some friends with whom I am so close, I think of them as sisters I got to choose.

And while spending holidays away from family can be hard, remember spending holidays with family has challenges too. There is a reason therapists are booked this time of year. So much "togetherness" can be overwhelming especially when family members define "family" as loved ones - entitled to speak their minds sans filter. Parents not-so-subtly hint unmarried children should settle down (like there wasn't enough pressure from your girl/boyfriend). Siblings "suggest" brothers or sisters procreate already so theirs' aren't the only grandchildren to engage their parents. Grandparents who lived through "The Great Depression" ponder aloud if it is a good idea for you to buy a new house in this economy. Big get-togethers might include more "colorful" members of the family tree: "Aunt Mildred" who gets a bit too "jolly" or "Uncle Henry" who for no apparent reason has become bitter and angry in his latter years.

Every Thanksgiving my family (of origin) gets together the Saturday of Thanksgiving weekend. It's no easy feat considering I have 3 brothers (one of whom lives in California and flies in with my sister-in-law, niece, and nephew). Everyone is married (with in-laws who want to see them), children (who have extracurricular activities), and big circles of friends. We all have our idiosyncrasies (something I have found challenging over the years) but I find myself accepting the chaos more easily and sincerely enjoying the time together knowing the next time can be a while (especially in this economy).

Big families mean lots of presents (I have 7 nieces and nephews in addition to my own 2 kids). Many typically count on bonuses to buy gifts, but in this market you can barely count on a paycheck let alone a bonus. What can you do to avoid monster credit card bills? Put price limits on gift exchanges or do some version of a "Secret Santa" to keep gift giving costs with-in reason. Make holiday parties more intimate (a smaller guest list means fewer people for whom to buy gifts).

Do what you can to enjoy the holidays stress free. Experiment with creative ways to keep gift giving in check. If you can't travel - embrace new traditions, and if you can and do choose to spend the holidays with extended family -find solace in knowing if nothing else, their antics make great stories to tell your friends.

Allison Berman, an artist and mother of two, handpaints custom home accessories for interior designers and private customers. She works out of her home studio in Warwick, NY. See her collection at www.withlovealib.com. She can be reached at ali@withlovealib.com. Her column appears Tuesdays.