That famous yellow bus

By Allison Berman
September 1, 2009

Tomorrow, my husband and I will both be home to put our little girl on the big yellow school bus for her first day of kindergarten, and I have to wonder if this momentous day will have half the impact on her that it will on us.

I did everything I could think of to make the transition from preschool to elementary school smooth. We went to the orientation in June, and some wonderful parents organized play dates in the park. We had plans with another kindergartner who will on the bus (so there will be a familiar face). And today we are going to go see her classroom, drop off her many school supplies and meet her teacher. So, my daughter's transition should be easy, but, weep, what about mine?

Forget the emotional component that my husband's and my baby is growing up. Practically speaking, my everyday life is going to be so different, especially since next week, my younger daughter is starting preschool two days per week. I feel like I just turned my life upside down to be home with my kids, and soon I am going to be the only one left at home.

In 3 years, I am going to be an empty-nester. I know the phrase usually refers to people my parents' age with grown children who have moved out. But, parents like me who left jobs to raise children and no longer have children home all day are "empty-nesters" too, only without the freedom.

Between drop-off and pickup
We tie our own hands because we still want to be available to pick up a sick or hurt child from school, to put kids on the bus in the morning and take them off in the afternoon. But, since kids aren't sick or hurt most days, what are you supposed to do with yourself for those seven hours between drop-off and pickup?

If you want to go back to work, try using your limited availability and your spouse's health-insurance package to your advantage. Finagle a flexible part-time position without benefits. Pitch it as saving the company money.

Volunteer. I'm involved with Jewish Federation, and we frequently discuss how to get other young people involved, so I know that chances are you'll be welcomed with open arms. And then there is always the PTA.

I have to admit, I am looking forward to having a little more flexibility. For the first time in two years, I won't be limited to Wednesdays (when my baby sitter comes) to make appointments. I might actually get my hair cut more than once a year and get to the dentist and doctor more reliably. I wonder what it will be like to do errands without buckling and unbuckling a child every time I get in and out of the car.

I am excited to finally be able to focus on my work and myself, but I am really going to miss having my children home with me. Thank goodness I have three more years to prepare myself for my big transition. After all, growing up is hard to do.

Allison Berman, an artist and mother of two, handpaints custom home accessories for interior designers and private customers. She works out of her home studio in Warwick, NY. See her collection at www.withlovealib.com. She can be reached at ali@withlovealib.com. Her column appears Tuesdays.